So, a conservative senator wants the beaver booted out of its lodge as Canada’s national symbol. Instead, we would honour the polar bear — while it lasts.

Instinctively, I’m against anything that any politically appointed Conservative senator is for; but this time, I think Sen. Nicole Eaton might be on to something. Or, at least, something worth ruminating over.

While I admire the industry of the beaver, it has several times caused me problems. At least twice, it has dammed a stream and flooded my back-country road.

And once, while finishing up a canoe trip, a beaver got in my way. I was returning up river against a gentle current. Ten days previously, I had floated downstream easily; but now, suddenly, my paddle was digging dirt and my canoe was bottoming out. What had once been a good stream was now a trickle. There were no footpaths along the river, so I stepped out of the canoe and started towing it upstream.

After 200 yards, I came around a bend and there was a brand new beaver dam, perhaps 20 yards wide and four feet high. Behind it was a splendid pond. I thought of taking the dam apart, but I knew the beavers would rebuild it that night. So, I hauled my canoe over the dam and enjoyed an easy paddle back to my car.

My real beaver problem is my running feud with the boathouse beaver. I own an ancient boathouse built out into the water and shored up with concrete walls and stone cribs. About 10 years ago, a beaver moved in and decided this would make a fabulous lodge protector. No dam needed. Just a massive pile of sticks and mud. And it set to work with a will. There is much truth to that saying, “Busy as a beaver.”

The boathouse is the entry point to my island cottage. When I pulled in, the boat stopped dead. I went to the bow and looked down, and there was a pile of sticks and mud 10 feet wide and six feet high. And there, watching from the decking, was a large beaver. I waved a paddle and it vanished. Then, I got a rake and started dismantling. But what Paul pulled apart by day, the beaver put back together by night.

This battle has continued over the years and, right now, I am winning. But, for all I know, the beaver is back there as I write. Busy as a beaver.

So, you can see why I have dark thoughts about the beaver. But I’m not so keen on the polar bear. Generally, I think one should avoid animals that could easily kill you and even enjoy you as a meal. Which is why, for a new Canadian symbol, I wouldn’t push the lion or bear or cougar or snow leopard or unicorn. (True, the unicorn is probably a vegetarian; it’s the impalement I worry about.)

If we are looking for a new symbol, there are many antlered creatures — elk, caribou, moose and deer. If we are looking for clever animals, we have the raccoon and the coyote. If we want clever with a touch of menace, there is the wolf.

And, should we favour cute, what about the meadow vole? Small and shy, although perhaps a bit rattish. Better still would be the groundhog. Although farmers might disagree.

I was pondering a choice of animals worthy of a national symbol when, suddenly, the perfect candidate loped into the room, carrying a bedroom slipper. Why not the dog? A boon companion; a friend. Even useful. Doesn’t build dams and is more a licker than a biter.

So, my vote goes to the dogs. Yes, I realize this opens a brand new can of worms because some people would choose cute purse dogs. Others might vote for something like the cockapoo. Which, hard to believe, is indeed a dog.

But there is really only one choice. And luckily, it is lying at my feet and chewing my last slipper.

Ladies and gentlemen, let us welcome the Labrador retriever.  IE