Picture this: you are sitting in a cold, air-conditioned meeting room with a new prospect. Toward the end of the conversation, you invite the prospect to ask any question he or she might have. At the same time, you cross your arms to keep warm.

Whatever your reason for folding you arms, the prospect will probably take the gesture as a signal that you are not interested in his or her response.

In the world of body language, your reason for doing something doesn’t matter; it’s how the action is perceived that counts.

“There’s nothing wrong with crossing your arms,” says Carol Kinsey Gorman, author of The Nonverbal Advantage: Secrets and Science of Body Language at Work. “But there’s a problem if your clients are perceiving that action incorrectly.”

Body language refers to all types of non-verbal communication, such as facial expressions, limb movements and even the inflection of your voice.

How much does body language influence your communication with clients? A lot, says Albert Mehrabian, professor emeritus of psychology at the University of California at Los Angeles. Mehrabian is best known for creating the “7/38/55 rule,” which states that impressions are based 7% on what you say; 38% on how you say it; and 55% on your body language.

In other words: it’s not what you say, but how you say it.

Kinsey Gorman builds on that formula by saying you have less than seven seconds to make a good first impression.

And during that seven seconds, a person is asking a number of questions, says Eliot Hoppe, Calgary-based author of the e-book, Body Language Boardroom Basics: The Non Verbal Signals You Must Decode! Adds Hoppe: “They are asking themselves, ‘Do I like you? Do I trust you? Are you safe?’”

There are a number of things you can do to make body language work for you:

> Express Openness

Communicate in a way that shows you are enthusiastic about your job and about the possibility of working with the client.

“Open” gestures can take various forms, says Kinsey Gorman, starting with a few seconds of eye contact during a firm initial handshake.

“Talking with your hands” is another way to show openness, according to Kinsey Gorman: “It shows you are energetic and enthusiastic.”

Just don’t overdo it, which can make you look erratic, she advises. And hand movements should be confined to the area above the desk and below the shoulders.

> Read Body Language

If you notice your client is sitting in a “closed” position, with arms folded and legs crossed, you can infer that he or she is not open to what you are saying, says Kinsey Gorman: “They are saying, ‘I am not sold yet’.”

To get the client to open up, ask if he or she would like a cup of coffee or to see a brochure. “In these cases,” Kinsey Gorman says, “anything that gets [the client] to uncross their arms is good.”

Often, adopting an open physical posture can lead the mind to follow. That theory is based on a University of California study conducted in 1990, which found that participants who were instructed to make a happy face became happier inside.

“The body and mind are interconnected,” Kinsey Gorman says. “If you want to feel an emotion or you want someone else to, then sometimes you need the body to take on that position first.”
@page_break@Urging a client to open up his or her posture may not close the deal, but it can make him or her more receptive to what you have to say.

> Exude Confidence

“Be sure that you look fresh, alert and enthusiastic,” says Hoppe.

That means an upright posture, which also indicates confidence and competence.

You can also express confidence in your tone of voice, which, according to Mehrabian’s rule, accounts for 38% of likability. “When we are unsure about something,” Hoppe says, “our voice goes up or down.”

The most confident advisors speak in an even tone — and talk in statements, not questions.

> Mirroring

Another effective tool to encourage open communication is a technique called “mirroring.”

When two people are deeply engaged in a conversation, their body language naturally mirrors each other’s. For example, two people chatting on a park bench might both find themselves resting their elbows on the back of the bench.

The same body-language pattern can occur in a client/advisor meeting. If you notice your client leaning in to get a closer look at a brochure, you can also lean in a few seconds later. The most effective communicators, Hoppe says, do this mirroring naturally.

Part of mirroring is matching the other person’s speech patterns, Kinsey Gorman says. For example, if the prospect is a fast talker or a slow talker, you can alter your speech accordingly: “When you speak in the same type of cadence, it’s like finding out your kids go to the same school. It’s a very eloquent way to connect with somebody.”

A casual conversation about a neutral subject, such as the weather, in the first few minutes of the meeting can help you gauge the other person’s body language. Observe your client’s eye contact, body movement and speaking intonation so you can sync accordingly.

Be careful not to make the mirroring too obvious, or it could look as if you are mocking the person, says Mitch Anthony, president of Advisor Insights Inc. in Rochester, Minn.: “You want to think about it as accommodating someone’s body language, but don’t mimic them.”

Perhaps the top “no no” of body language is touching your face at any point during a client meeting. Known as the “Pinocchio syndrome,” touching your face means that you are leaking another emotion from within your body and, thus, not telling the truth.

As Hoppe explains: “When you tell a lie, certain body parts may become engorged with blood and feel itchy.”

Even movements such as playing with a pen or finger-tapping can indicate to the prospect you aren’t certain of what you are saying. It doesn’t matter that you are making those movements out of shyness. “If you say one thing and your body does another,” Kinsey Gorman says, “people will believe what they see and not what you say.”

> Reading Your Clients

You can also watch for inconsistencies in your client’s behaviour. For example, if the client says, “I really like you” while positioning his or her chest away from you, says Kinsey Gorman, the words and body are not aligned.

If you notice that a client’s feet are pointing toward the door, chances are he or she is losing interest.

“The feet tell the brain where the heart wants to go,” Hoppe says. “No matter how hard you are trying to hide what you are thinking, it always shows through body language.” IE