This case study is based on the situation of a client of the Covenant Group. Names and details have been changed to preserve privacy.
“So, what’s next?” Terry Howard asked. We were concluding our end-of-the-year coaching session and Terry, a successful advisor for 10 years, was wondering where we would go from there. He had completed our formal practice-development program three years earlier and had subsequently retained our firm to provide monthly coaching.
“Perhaps it was a little presumptuous on my part, Terry,” I responded, “but I had hoped we would renew our coaching arrangement for another year. I believe you get good value form our sessions and…”
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” he interrupted. “Of course, we are going to stick with our monthly sessions. They are extremely useful, if for no other reason than having you hold me accountable for the things I say I want to do. Left alone, I simply would not have the self-discipline to execute on my business plan. Knowing that I have to report in every month keeps me motivated and on track.
“Plus, there is all the tweaking and adjusting to my practice that we come up with as our experience tells us what is working and what isn’t,” he continued. “I want to improve continually. But what I am asking now is: what’s the next level? How do I move up another notch?”
“Well, thanks for that vote of confidence, Terry,” I said. “In fact, I have also been wondering what we could add to the mix of things you are doing to build your business that could elevate it even further. You are obviously doing many things right. Your progress over the past three years has been enviable and satisfying for both of us. Yet, I feel there is more potential there to be realized. My conclusion is that it might be time to bring another person into the relationship.”
“Are you saying you no longer want to be my coach?” Terry jumped in.
“Not at all,” I replied. “I hope to work with you for as long as you feel you are getting value. However, it might be time for you to establish a relationship with someone who can help you in a different way: as a mentor.”
“But aren’t you my mentor?” Terry asked.
“On one level, I am, because I do offer advice and guidance,” I said. “I do that, however, from the perspective of a coach rather than as a true mentor.”
“I am not sure I get the difference,” Terry admitted.
I told him that the words “coach” and “mentor” are frequently used interchangeably but, in fact, have quite different connotations.
“You know I am fascinated by word origins, so forgive me for this etymology lesson,” I said. “But mentors have been around much longer than coaches.”
I explained to Terry that in Greek mythology, Mentor was the character in Homer’s Odyssey who was left in charge of guiding Odysseus’s son while Odysseus went off to fight the Trojan War.
Coaching, on the other hand, appears to originate in the 19th century and probably refers to the multi-tasking skills associated with controlling the team of horses pulling a stagecoach.
Coaching, then, is a method of directing, instructing and training a person to achieve some goal or develop specific skills. There are many coaching methods, including workshops, one-on-one training and supervised practice, all of which Terry and I had been through together.
Today, the word “mentor” has come to mean a trusted friend, counsellor or teacher who provides expertise to help others advance their careers, enhance their education and build their influence.
I explained: “Think of guru/disciple or teacher/protégé relationships such as Socrates and Plato, Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson, Laurence Olivier and Anthony Hopkins, Freddy Laker and Richard Branson, Yoda and Luke Skywalker, Batman and Robin, Dr. Dre and Eminem…”
“OK, enough, enough,” Terry laughed in protest. “I get the picture. A coach focuses on skill development, while a mentor is more about life development.”
“In a phrase, yes,” I answered. “To be sure, you and I have explored some of your life issues, goals and values because they have a bearing on how you manage your practice. That provided us with context for the methodology you are using to achieve your objectives. I believe you are ready, however, to add another dimension to your work and your life — and a good mentor could provide another perspective that would be a valuable complement to our work together.”
@page_break@“Got anyone in mind?” Terry asked.
“No, but I do have a sense of the type of person who would probably qualify,” I responded. “What qualities do you think you want to have in such a person?”
“Well, to start with, I would have to respect him or her,” Terry offered. “That’s a given.”
“And how would this person earn that respect?” I asked.
After a moment of thought, Terry answered: “Success in his or her own business and a reputation for honesty and integrity among staff, customers, peers and competitors. And, I guess, if this person were going to counsel me about life, he or she should have success in that regard as well — good family relationships, community involvement — and share many of the values that I have.”
“What else?” I urged.
“This mentor should be smarter than I am, don’t you think?” Terry wondered.
“Smarter? Maybe.” I said, “But different experience might be more important than mental horsepower. Anything else?”
“I’d have to like this person if I was going to spend any significant amount of time with him or her,” he added. “This mentor would have to be easy to talk to and not too serious all the time — able to have a little fun, as well.”
“Isn’t there another side to that coin? Wouldn’t the mentor have to like you and enjoy spending time with you, as well?” I asked.
“Of course, it would have to be mutual in that regard,” Terry said.
“That mutual feeling also extends to respect,” I suggested. “I think it is important for this person to respect you for all the same reasons you respect him or her, don’t you?”
“That certainly makes sense,” Terry conceded. “And there is something else. This person would have to be interested in helping me. The reward would only be a psychological one — and maybe a dinner now and then — so they would have to want to do this.”
“This mentor needs to be interested in your success,” I agreed. “Does anyone come to mind who fits the person you just described?”
“Actually, a couple of people do,” Terry said with some excitement. “Dominic Pasquale was my coach in junior hockey and we still get along very well whenever we see each other. He went on to build a very successful retail business until he was bought out about a year ago by one of the big chains. Everyone loved him — his staff, his customers, even his competitors admired him for the way he ran his company. I know from a recent conversation with him that he intends to devote much of his time doing charitable and community activities. Maybe he would be willing to count me among those causes!”
“I am pretty sure he wouldn’t see you as a charity case,” I added. “Who else popped up for you as a potential mentor?”
“The other guy is Don Matthews,” Terry said. “He taught me business and economics at university and we often spent time discussing a wide variety of things.
“You know how people often say that one particular teacher had a profound influence on their lives? Well, Prof. Matthews was that guy for me. It was his enthusiasm for the world of finance and business that prompted me to look at this business and decide to build my career here.
“I heard that he is retiring at the end of this semester,” Terry added. “So, maybe he’ll have some time available. He would be a fabulous mentor.”
“Sounds like you have two powerful candidates,” I said. “What are you going to do next?”
“I am going to contact them both and simply present the idea,” Terry said. “What if they both say, ‘Yes’?”
“Wouldn’t that be wonderful!” I offered. “You might end up with two exceptional people willing to bring their respective insights into your world. That can only be to your benefit. And, by the way, as your coach, I am going to add this to your to-do list between now and our next session together. How’s that?”
“Somehow I knew that was going to happen,” Terry laughed. “But I am very excited about this assignment. I’ll keep you posted on my progress.” IE
Do you need a coach or a mentor?
They are not the same. A coach helps you develop specific skills, while a mentor focuses on life development
- By: George Hartman
- February 4, 2008 February 4, 2008
- 10:20