People who have a negative view of asking for referrals often have a tough time growing their business, says Matt Anderson, founder of the Referral Authority in Chicago. As a result, they may spend time on less effective and more expensive ways of marketing their practices.
Follow Anderson’s advice to change your attitude and think positively about asking for referrals:
Ask why you are reluctant to ask for referrals
A helpful first step is to change your attitudes about referrals by taking the time to understand what is holding you back.
Think carefully about what bothers you about asking for referrals, says Anderson. For example, do you think referrals make you sound pushy or cheesy? Maybe you don’t like to look needy in front of clients. Or perhaps you are worried that clients will think you are just another salesman.
Consider your strengths
Start thinking positively about referrals by reminding yourself of your skills and strengths.
Think of something positive – such as particular ways in which you excel at helping clients – to shift your thoughts away from your fears, says Anderson. Come up with short phrases to say to clients or to simply remind yourself to feel positive about referrals.
For example, Anderson recommends something similar to: “I am good at what I do, I know I can help people you care about and I know I need to ask you.” Or: “The worst they can say is: ‘I’m not comfortable.’ The best is: ‘Sure, I didn’t know you were taking on new clients.'”
Choose a strategy
Feel more confident about asking for referrals by deciding on a specific strategy.
In general, there are two ways to approach asking for a referral, says Anderson: they can be described as the “direct ask” and the “indirect ask.”
The direct approach involves asking your client in a straightforward manner for a referral. For example: “Susan, you’ve mentioned your business partner, Michelle Johnson, to me in previous meetings. Is there any chance the three of us could get together for lunch some time?
The indirect strategy involves asking a client for his or her advice on how to approach a referral. For example, “Susan, you’ve mentioned your business partner, Michelle Johnson, to me in previous meetings. What would be your advice on how to speak with her to find out if she might be interested in the planning process we offer?”
Think of asking for referrals as a skill
It can take time before you feel comfortable asking for referrals, so keep practising.
“Becoming good at bringing in referrals is a skill that can be learned,” says Anderson. “It’s something that people just need to practise.”
Think about who you would feel comfortable asking first and start with them, he advises. For example, you might start by asking a client with whom you have a very good relationship.
Make it a habit
Make your improved attitude to referrals a habit by taking specific steps to reinforce your decision to ask for more referrals.
“The only way to reinforce anything new is to keep it top of mind,” says Anderson. For example, you might stick a note on your computer with a positive phrase to remind you why you should ask for referrals.